Welcome to the world-famous San Juan Mime Academy. Over the past 50 years, the SJMA has produced some of the world's finest mimes. The SJMA, modeled after France's famed Le Mime School, is known best for its specialties: Walking Against the Wind, Trapped in a Box, and Climbing Downstairs. 

Today, SJMA is experiencing a revival, as twelve new students have enrolled in the last four years. We welcome you to SJMA. And we hope you'll join us.

Note: Due to several mishaps, we are no longer offering Walking the Plank. On a related note, students are no longer permitted on the roof of the Building of Silence. On a still related note, all students are now required to attend the "Physics, Gravity, and You" seminar upon enrollment. Thank you for your cooperation. Get well soon, Rene.  

About SJMA

The San Juan Mime Academy first pretended to open its doors in 1968. The fake ribbon cutting ceremony was mimed to perfection by Louis Pierre Bernier, France's top mime at the time, marking the opening of the first and only mime school in Puerto Rico.

Though Puerto Rico is not known for its miming prowess, SJMA continues to attract students from mime powerhouses like Paris and Quebec. And thanks to the universality of mime, there is no such thing as a language barrier at the SJMA. All can learn.

To date, more than 50 students have passed through our "doors," and 49 have graduated with honors*. 
 

* Several years ago, one of our students disappeared, never to be heard from again. Many claim this was an example of miming too well. Legend is that this mime successfully mimed a never-before and never-since mimed action called "Walking Through the Door to Nothingness." This is impossible, and we are certain he was abducted by a rival mime school. Details are in the Have You Seen This Mime link.

Phone

No phone. We mime.

Location

22 Calle Mime
San Juan, PR 00926

Hours

M-Sa 8am–5pm
Su Closed

It is a question as old as time itself: Must mimes always remain silent? The answer is a complex one that dates back to the early days of mime. 

Mime originated in Lebrieux, France, in 1722. A family named LeMime was discovered living in a shanty in the woods. Unable to speak, the eldest son, Guy LeMime, created his own language that consisted of five words: I'm stuck in a box. Unfortunately, his parents were simply amused with their son's movements, not realizing that he was actually stuck in a glass box. He died of starvation weeks later. 

In honor of Guy LeMime, all of France was taught this basic wordless vocabulary. For years, the French were obsessed with pretending they were stuck in a box and could not get out. 

Then one day, Gilbert DeGillette expanded this wordless language to include more complex phrases.  Ever since,the language has grown into an artform. Phrases like "My hat is blowing off my head" and "The walls are closing in" were soon a part of every mime's repertiore. 

CURRICULUM

A sample of some of our courses include:

An introduction to mime. A requirement for all of our students, an introduction to mime teaches the basic movements of miming. 

Stuck in a box. The classic. Stuck in a box is the foundation upon which all miming is done. 

I'm crying. Sure, it seems like all the mime does is use his fists to rub his eyes. But this class teaches proper fist-making techniques and sad-face makeup application. A must for every mime with feelings. 

Makeup 101. White and black face paint seems simple to apply, but your makeup is the most important part of miming. Are you a happy mime? A sad mime? A crying mime? You decide! 

Advanced makeup: Ever since the "grunge mime" movement, it has become necessary to teach new makeup application techniques. Angry mime, depressed mime, and stoned mime are just a few of the newest additions that grunge miming has brought us. 

The courses above are just a sampling of the classes that the San Juan Mime Academy has to offer. For more information, call 1-800-BE-A-MIME. Just kidding. There would be nothing but glorious silence on the other end of the line.

"                    ."

- Luc Richard
 

"          !"

- Henri Michaud
 
 

"          .              ?                ."

- Jean "Mr. Loudmouth" Pinchot